In an effort to keep this blog updated semi regularly, I’m going to pick 2 days out of the week to have schedualed updates. I’m picking Tuesday and Thursday.

So on Every tuesday and friday there will be (along with regular knitting stuffs), specifics. Like memes. Only better.

So it’s after midnight where I am, so that means it’s tuesday. Here’s the inaugural Ten on Tuesday.

Ten On Tuesday:
Make a list of Ten things about that weeks subject.
This Week:
10 Favorite Movie Songs
It can either be a song that was sung in a movie, or something from the soundtrack.
1- Wild & Untamed Thing - Rocky Horror Picture Show
2- Worst Pies in London - Sweeney Todd
3- Tradition - Fiddler on the Roof
4- Money Money Money - Cabaret
5- School of Rock - School of Rock
6- Big Trouble in Little China - Big Trouble in Little China
7- Greased Lightning - Grease
8- Cool Rider - Grease 2
9- Cellblock Tango - Chicago
10- These are my Friends - Sweeney Todd

Next Weeks Theme: 10 Simple Things that Make you Happy.

As for knitting, Right this very second, I’m workign on a new pattern for you pattern junkies. For anyone who likes tea parties, you’ll LOVE this. I promise.

The yarn IS EVIL.

No, I’m not kidding.

Let me tell you a bit of history before I delve right in.

Our local Goodwill, every year, has a megahuge craft sale. They horde donated craft supplies for about 8 months out of the year, and then stick em on a huge table and mark everything for way below what it should be.

This past Friday & Saturday was that craft sale.
So Friday morning, I woke up, 9:30 AM, got myself cleaned up and dressed, and we were all off.

Now, I’m one of those people that stores all my yarn in one of those huge 40 gallon sterilite totes/tubs/boxes with a lid. Prior to the sale, it was MAYBE halfway full.

Now I have to sit on it to get the handles to snap on to the lid.

Yeah. Huge amounts of yarn now.

So all of Saturday was spent either:
A) surfing ravelry for a pattern to use some of said yarn OR
B) Fondling said yarn because it is so yummylicious.

And after all that surfing (8+ hours of looking at socks, sweaters and shawls) I have come to the conclusion that yarn has mind control powers.
EVIL mind control powers. In fact, I believe that one day everyone will pick up the craft, and then buy so much yarn that they will be forced to go into debt. Yarn will destroy the economy (worse than it is.). Watch and see. You’ll be sorry you didn’t listen to me. This is why you should buy your yarn second hand. It’s cheaper this way, and you can often find discontinued yarns. They’re powers are diminished because they have been sitting around so long.

I’m also of the opinion that each yarn has personality.

For example, let’s delve through the yarn I bought on Friday.

First up we have 2 skeins of “Nocturne”, a mohair/poly blend. These two are the party girl twins. The first to the party and last to leave, they can outdrink even the most seasoned motorcycle riders, and they are always the first to take their tops off. They shout at me from the stash, screaming about what losers are in there with them, and won’t I take them out so we can have some FUN!

Next we have the hostess of said party. This was in a random plastic bag, with a note on what the fiber content was. Mohair, wool, and poly slub. It’s double stranded. It’s soft and cuddly, but still very wild in it’s own right.

This one I think is like the playboy bunny of the yarn world. Pretty to look at, kind of fun to play with, but ultimately it just wants to sit there and look pretty. It’s 100% rayon, and kind of rough to the touch. I thought it was wool at first. Its kind of like fake boobies in that manner. You think they are real at first…This one also had no label or anything, so I’m considering it naked. See? Playboy bunny. Also, I think it’s kind of drunk and needs something to hold it up. Blonde Bimbo anyone?

These two bags of yarn are the “Team Players”. Or rather, the teams, maybe? They are both 100% Acrylic (steroids, anyone?), and quite soft to the touch. The purple one is in between sport and worsted (DK weight?). It said worsted on the packaging, but the WPI is wrong, and it’s quite thin. Hmm. Yuhp. This yarn was on steroids.
The blue is sportweight, and VERY soft and S-T-R-E-T-C-H-Y. Kind of like the Olympic gymnastics team.

Ahhh..here we go. Good old worsted weight virgin wool. This is the grandma of the group. Content to be by herself, surrounded by everyone else who has things to do, places to be. She’s seen it all, and knows how to just sit back and relax and enjoy life right in that moment. In a classic color, too. Nothing fancy, just nice, soft, and always there for you. I wish MY grandma was like that when she was alive.

More wool, this time it’s 80% Acrylic, 10% wool. Looks like grandma had some work done. I akin this one to Joan Rivers. (“Too much surgery often results in Joan Rivers.” – Dr. Wooldor, “Drawn Together”)
It’s still quite nice and soft and a pleasure to work with. This is earmarked for a pair of hiking socks. Nice thick squishy hiking socks.

Ahhh Yarn Bee. I love and Hate yarn bee yarns. Yarn Bee is Hobby Lobby’s house brand. Every one of them is acrylic, most of it with slubs, metallic threads, and eyelashes. Which is fine in its own right as trimming, but not as a WHOLE GARMENT (*couch LIONBRAND cough*). This one seems to have come out all right. I think all the other, slubby fakey yarns made fun of it in the store, and it just packed it’s bags and left. It’s VERY soft and cuddly, still acrylic, but not “fakey” acrylic.

These three skeins of yarn were in the same bag. They are baby yarns, and I think they were holding a nanny convention in there. Talking about babies and changing diapers and keeping them warm on cold, rainy nights. Secretly, I think were plotting how, through a mother’s work of knitting or crocheting a garment for her baby, they might secretly plant the want and desire for more yarn into the baby’s brain while it is sleeping. Yes, I’m on to you, Evil yarns! Do not try to pull the wool over my eyes!
(errr..Acrylic over my eyes?)

These two are hanging out together. Twins, but not quite. “Saucy” is 100% mercerized cotton yarn. What do you do with cotton yarn? You put it to work, because cotton is the workhorse of the yarn community. YEE HAW! SCRUB THEM DISHES, SAUCY TWINS!

And then of course, you have the lowly crochet thread. I bought 10 skeins of the stuff (some of it only partial skeins). This stuff isn’t evil. It doesn’t plant a desire in your heart like no other to spend copius amounts of money on it. Of course that could be because I’ve never seen a skein of crochet thread that cost over 2 dollars.

Although I’m trying to figure out WHY I bought 3 skeins of white cotton thread, and a whole bunch of pink stuff. Seriously. I hate pink. Maybe it’s cus the pink is shiiiinnnyyyy…? AHA. There it is. Crochet thread is shiny. The yarn employs the crochet thread so that people who do both crafts will go doubly in debt, thereby taking over the economy twice as fast!

That’s only some of the yarn I bought. Plus I got at least 12 pairs of needles, and about 7 crochet hooks as well. Oh and a whole bunch of vintage patterns.

CURSE YOU MIND CONTROLLING HOBBY!

Now..the question is…what to DO with it all…

(Also, this post was 4 pages long, in word. Dude. Wtf?)

It’s 2 in the morning, and I can NOT sleep. It’s hot, and with 2 window units blowing on me, I’m still overheating. So sitting here, in the dark, knitting worsted weight cable socks by the light of my compouter monitor, I decided to do some “memes.”
Becuase I enjoy filling out stupid surveys, and these are incredibly fun. Shut. Up.

The first one I found at cmeknit.blogspot.com:

What is your all time favourite yarn to knit with?
Well, I’ve only knit with actual wool twice, and both times came out terribly. So I have to say Caron Simply Soft, or Bernat Softy Chunky

Your favourite needles?
Anythign in size 8. I have 4 pair of single points, a set of double points, and a set of circs - the only size I own in Circs, by the way.

The worst thing you’ve ever knit?
Oh..dear..I knit my aunt this HORRIBLE scarf. IT was the second thing I ever knit. IT was made form this GODAWFUL red/green HOMESPUN, with CHICKEN YELLOW fun fur trim on the ends. Its no wonder she never wears it. Ew. I should make her a cabley one to say I’m sorry.

Your most favourite knit pattern?
Anything with cables.
Actually, right now, my most favorite knit pattern has been the Yarn Vomit Scarf that I designed. Crazy, I know. I love sitting down and not having to worry about where I am. I always have one on the needles now, for stressed sknitting.

Most valuable knitting technique?
Cabling without a cable needle. Easily.

Best knit book or magazine?
Book? Thats a toughie. DomiKnitRix is my absolute favorite. not just for the designs, but for the myriad of knowledge and wisdom. Now, when somethin isnt going right in my knitting, I stop, and yell at my yarn: “BEND TO MY WILL! YOU WILL DO AS I SAY!” And all becuase of that book.

Your favourite knit-a-long?

Haven’t done one yet. I hosted one, but it didnt go very well. Maybe I should join one..

Your favourite knitblogs?
The Panopticon. I LOVE IT. <33

Your favourite knitwear designer?
I dont have one, really. Does that make me a bad person?

The knit item you wear the most?
Any one of my many hats, or my Slytherin Scarf. Which was my very first knit. I still LOVE it, even though it is garter stitch.

Next MeMe. Stolen form Grumperina’s blog. You may find hers Here

Feel free to answer this meme and pass it along. The only rule is that the 10 things must (must!) be related to knitting.

1. for as long as I’ve been knitting, I can NOT do colorwork. Stranded or Fair Isle, Intarsia, and any other kind of colorwork, besides stripes, eludes me. I did do a swatch in a greek key pattern ONCE, and i have not been able to do ANY colorwork ever since then.

2. I only recently learned to purl correctly. Remember, wrap counter-clockwise. Took me forever to learn that.

3. Most of my needles are size 8. When cleaning my room, I found 3 pair pair of needles that I did not know I had before then. Go figure.

4. I LOVE knitting beautiful things in large gauge. I would like to knit lace, but I like knitting things on needles size 8 and above.

5. I have never actually participated properly in a knitalong. I really should at some point.

6. Almost everything I do is knitted with cables. This could be directly related to my inability to do any kind of colorwork, or my love of things made in 1-2 colors.

7. I enjoy stealth - knitting, but about halfway into my projects I’m almost always found out, and so must resort to other gifts for birthdays and christmastime.

8. I carry my knitting with me wherever I go. I find scarves with repeating patterns to be the perfect solution to car rides of any length.

9. I LOVE KNITTING IN PUBLIC. I love seeing people see me knit in public, and so I take my knitting with me everywhere possible. To date I’ve knitted in 3 mcdonalds, 5 walmarts, a shoneys, and a home depot.

10. I watch movies JUST for the knitting. I watch commercials and read books carefuly to see if theres any knitting mentioned or shown.

BONUS:
11. I have taught my dad the difference between garter and stockinette, cables and lace, fairisle and intarsia. Now, when we go clothes shopping, HE points stuff out to ME, with correct terminology. He even offers to buy me yarn, and watches for craft sales. My mom, who taught me a love of crafting, doesnt even go that far.

And one more knitting meme for you.
Stolen from MLO knitting.

Mark with bold the things you have knit at least once, with italics the ones you plan to do sometime, and leave the rest.

Afghan
I-cord
Garter stitch
Knitting with metal wire
Shawl
Stockinette stitch
Socks: top-down
Socks: toe-up
Knitting with camel yarn
Mittens: Cuff-up
Mittens: Tip-down
Hat
Knitting with silk
Moebius band knitting
Participating in a KAL
Sweater
Drop stitch patterns
Knitting with recycled/secondhand yarn
Slip stitch patterns
Knitting with banana fiber yarn
Domino knitting (modular knitting)
Twisted stitch patterns
Knitting with bamboo yarnTwo end knitting
Charity knitting
Knitting with soy yarn
Cardigan
Toy/doll clothing
Knitting with circular needles
Baby items
Knitting with your own handspun yarn
Slippers
Graffiti knitting (knitting items on, or to be left on the street)
Continental knitting
Designing knitted garments
Cable stitch patterns (incl. Aran)
Lace patterns
Publishing a knitting book
Scarf
Teaching a child to knit
American/English knitting (as opposed to continental)
Knitting to make money
Button holes
Knitting with alpaca
Fair Isle knitting
Norwegian knitting
Dying with plant colors
Knitting items for a wedding
Household items (dishcloths, washcloths, tea cozies…)
Knitting socks (or other small tubular items) on two circulars
Olympic knitting
Knitting with someone else’s handspun yarn
Knitting with DPNs
Holiday related knitting
Teaching a male how to knitBobbles
Knitting for a living
Knitting with cotton
Knitting smocking
Dying yarn
SteeksKnitting art
Knitting two socks (or other small tubular items) on two circulars simultaneously
Fulling/felting
Knitting with wool
Textured knitting
Kitchener BO
Purses/bags
Knitting with beads
Swatching
Long Tail CO
Entrelac
Knitting and purling backwards
Machine knitting
Knitting with self-patterning/self-striping/variegating yarn
Stuffed toys
Baby items
Knitting with cashmere
Darning
Jewelry
Knitting with synthetic yarn
Writing a pattern
GlovesIntarsia
Knitting with linen
Knitting for preemies
Tubular CO
Freeform knitting
Short rows
Cuffs/fingerless mitts/arm warmers
Pillows
Knitting a pattern from an online knitting magazine
Rug
Knitting on a loom
Thrummed knitting
Knitting a gift
Knitting for pets
Shrug/bolero/poncho
Knitting with dog/cat hair
Hair accessories
Knitting in public

Good night, people.

Edit: Found one more. Yeah. I need sleep sometime, but not right now. 2 more inches of ribbing on this damn sock. >.< I will finish both of them. I WILL.
1. Do you knit continental or English?
I know uhm…The one with the left hand. Continental? But I often switch back and forth between combined, continental, and english.

2. How long ago did you learn to knit?
Uhm..well my gramma kinda taught me when I was about 8, but it stuck when I was 18…so I LEARNED 11 years ago. I started amassing knowledge about a year and a half ago though.

3. First FO?
Slytherin Scarf.

4. Favorite yarn?
Caron SS or Bernat Softy Chunkee.

5. Favorite pattern?
Uhm. Didnt I answer this? Yarn Vomit.

6. Favorite pattern source?
Ravelry! I search there daily.

7. Favorite needles?
I pretty much use Boye needles for anything, mostly in size 8.

8. Nicest thing you’ve ever knit?
Everyone is going crazy for my mint chocolate hat, and my yarn vomit scarf.

9. Most hated project?
The shitty scarf I knitted up for my aunt 3 years ago.

10. Who are you going to pass this on to?
Anyone who reads this, consider yourself tagged to fill it out.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve had an obsession with food. Specifically, anything sweet.
Aparrantly there are hordes of other knitters & Crocheters who enjoy food as much as I do.
A quick search of “Food” on Ravelry’s pattern search page, comes up with 9 pages. That’s 165 patterns.
And Thats just a fraction. What about those patterns that people just sort of make up as they go along?

Theres Crocheted and Knitted Cupcakes, Ice Cream, Pie, Cake..The list goes on. I’ve even found crocheted eggs & Bacon, Waffles, Lobster, and a Chocolate Easter Bunny.

Yes, there is no doubt that knitters & Crocheters have an obsession with food of all kinds.

But what about when you go past the literal and just take themes, like colors (such as pink, brown and white for neopolitan..), or they chart in pictures, rather than imitating the food itself in what they create.

Searching through my stash about a week ago I came across a skein of super light green yarn, and dark brown yarn. My first thought was:
Mint Chocolate Chip.

So I grabbed some random needles, and cast on, double stranded (on 10.5s). My idea was for a striped stocking cap. Relatively loose fitting, kind of long…

Halfway thorugh the hat, the following conversation ensued:
Me: *holds up peice of flat knitting* What do you think?
Dad: *thinks for a minute* Mint Chocolate?
Me: EXACTLY!

This hat is knitted double stranded, flat, on two needles (size 10.5). If you want the pattern, let me know and I’ll write it up. (provided I can remember what the hell I did…). It took me about 5 days to knit up, and that was only working on it 1-2 hours a day. If you bust ass on friday, you can wear it to school Monday.

This hat is slightly too big for my head (I have to bobby pin it my hair) but it’s large enough to stick my hair IN (On days I’m feeling particularly jewish & Halachic), so it’s good if your religion requires you to cover yoru hair, but a scarf is too fiddly.

Now introducing: The Mint Chocolate Hat.

Comments? Bueller? Bueller?

Another post in as many days. What’s the world coming to?!

Amongst all the summer cleaning, stash organising, preperations for my birthday, and half finished projects, I finally managed to force myself to sit down and FINISH something that required FINISHING. Like sewing and weaving in ends and stuff. Wanna seeee? You know you do.
You like looking at knitting porn, don’t you, dirty reader? Yeah. You like it.

Sorry, been rereading DomiKnitrix. Okay?

This is my new purse.

It’s a bit small for my tastes, so I have to pare down what I normally carry. Blegh. I dun like that. >.<

I got the pattern from a Caron Pamphlet last year, and I’ve been waiting till my knitting skills were up to par with the pattern. The 61″ of seed stitch was a bit much, and thats what held up the process for so long. Suckage.

I also made the strap a bit shorter, becuase A) I’m short and B) I ran out of yarn. Yuh.

Also, here’s a sneak peak at the White Nights scarf that I’m knitting:

The yarn is a discontinued one, Berella BIG. I got two skeins of it from the thrift store. 3/4 of the first skein was used for a hat, which may have to be frogged (I never wear it anyway) for the sake of the scarf, which is for a very good friend of mine. This is knit on size 15’s, by the way.

While summer cleaning, I came across the following:
2 hanks of virgin wool (maroon and navy blue)
1 set of size 9 needles that I didn’t even know I HAD
1 set of size 10.5, again I didn’t know I had.
a single size 8 needle. I continue cleaning tomorrow, I might find the second. If not, this makes a god spare for wearing in my hair, holding stitches, or stirring my coffee.

Also, I’ve lost my size 13s again, and I don’t know where the fuck they went, becuase I haven’t used them in over a year. wtf?

I also finished the first strip of the counterpane for the lapghan I’m making for *CENSORED*. Yeah. Becuase she’s sexay and deserving of an awesome lapghan, bitches. Anyone who wants to help me in this endeavor, let me know. I’m taking 6″ x 6″ squares for it.

The Goodwill Craft Sale is on the 13th of this month. Lets hope I have money. Everythign is aroudn 50% off, and they have a room stacked from floor to ceiling with awesome stuffage. Lets hope I can score pwnage.

So yeah. There you have it, for tonight.

Forgot to add: Frogged the old swamp witch (Stormy Waters. Eugh. Eww. Crapily done.) and wound the yarn (all four strands together) into 3 center pull skeins. I have no clue what to do with it..but I’m sure I’ll figure out something.

A question from the SCT (Standardised Crafting Test).

Is a person who Knits AND Crochets considered -
A) Bicraftual
B) Ambicraftous
C) A Swinger
Discuss.

On the Needles:
Yarn Vomit Scarf
White Nights Scarf
Jayne Hat

On the Hooks
Baby Chicken Sweater (for a doll)
Star Wars Filet
Family Filet
Winter Warmer Afghan

So, I know. It’s been forever since I updated. Shut up.

This post will have Pictures. Does that make up for it? HUH? DOES IT?

Well just so you know, DIALUP USERS = DEATH. I mean, I’m on dialup, and it took less tme to write this post than it took to get the photos uploaded to Photobucket, but that doesn’t mean that all dialup users should read this post. You HAVE BEEN WARNED.

Okay, so, The fair is over. I did win Ribbons with my mad knitting & Crocheting & sewing skills, among others. Pictures? Yes, I think so!

Swamp Witch & Sparky the Hand Puppet: First place on Both Accounts. Ignore the other peoples stuff. PAY ATTENTION TO MIIINNEEEE.

Here we have the Floral Arrangement of Pwnage. Isn’t it prettyful? Look at the shiiinnyyy blue ribbon. First place!

Also, Following in short order – A Carved Wooden Fish. First place, As well. SCORE.

A Painted Egg (Painted with Acrylic paint) - First Place. SAWEET. I AM THE AWESOME. (or not.)

A Baby Bonnet (3rd place), The “petticoat for the ages” (4th place), A Zentangle (3rd place), And a Platic Canvas Thinger Majigger (2nd Place.)

This was a select few among the over 20 items I entered (most of it being baked goods).

So, after busting ass to get all this stuff done, what’s a girl to do?

Enter the county beauty pageant. I didn’t win, but I got a kickass trophy from it.

So what else?

Well, I spent the fair reading Tarot. BEST EXPERIENCE OF MY LIFE. I LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT.

Seriously. So much so, that I’m now trying to start up my own business in Tarot Reading. I enjoy it to the max. Here’s some photos for you.

BARNEY FIFE IS THE SHIZZ, BITCHES.

Tarot Readings - $5.00 (This was my sign. Hand painted.)

Reading for the Pageant Winner (Chalea James is her name, and she is the most deserving of the title for this years fairest of the fair pageant.)

Reading - This is on my business card. I love this picture, which was taken by Chalea’s mom, who is a professional photographer. She is TEH AWESOME. They both are.

And what do you do at the fair? You get your dad to win you stuff. Like this kickass hat that he won me:

One of my bestest friends loved it so much, we went back another night to the same stand to win her won. She’ll get in september, when she comes to visit. And we’ll be sexy cowgirl bitches.

So, during the fair, I was talking to one of the women who is on the fair board.

Wouldn’t you know it? She crochets. She did this beautiful carousel horse filet, which only won second place (stupid judges. Although what won was a HYUGE HYUGE latch-hook leopard..7′ L x 3′ W), and so I asked her about teaching me. I get to the tent the next day, and there’s a bag. in the bag was a skein of crochet thread, a hook, a chart, pattern, and stitch guide, and a note that said:

“Margo, chain 235, and get back to me - Sue.”

So I did, and now I can crochet. YAY.

I did not do anything during Ravelympics that I said I would. But I finished two crochet hats!

Hat 1) A purpley-teal rasta hat/beret thingy. This is going on my Etsy. Maybe.

Hat 2) A Yellow, Orange, and Red beret thingy. Pattern from American Thread Co. Star Book # somethingorother. it has a whole crapload of patterns using “Ripples”. Woot! This might also go on my Etsy. Maybe.

So, on the 2nd (Read as: Tuesday) this stuff goes to the next fair, which is in Knoxville. OH YEAH. Happiness abounds. I might enter one of those crocheted hats.

Okay, so there it is. Picture intensive, but you loved it. Yes you did.

On the needles:
Yarn Vomit Scarf (75% complete)
White Nights Scarf (25% complete)
Magic Snowfall Gloves (20% complete)
Counterpane for Patchwork Anti-Craft Blanket (1/5 strips 75% done)
Jayne Hat (15% done)
Textured Messenger Bag (90% done)

On the Hooks:
Filet Wall Hanging (10% done)
Star Wars Filet (10% done)
Winter Warmer Afghan (2% done)

Also note, much of this stuff might not go on ravelry, becuase I’m way too lazy.

Then again it might go on ravelry becuase I love that site.

Also, look for Crochet Patterns here in the near future, since I’m fiddling with that as well. WOOTNESS.
‘Till Next Time!

Asshats abound. You can find them anywhere. The typical asshat will have his head so far up his ass that he is eating his own appendix. That is the mark of a true asshat.

Allow me to explain.

The Anti-Craft is my favorite above all favorites of online crafting zines. I admit I’m kind of biased becuase they have a forum, and I spend almost every hour of every day, logged into that forum. We’re a true community, filled with support for each other in endeavors other than crafting, although a significant amount of time is spent talkign about any kind of craft you can imagine. I myself haunt the sewing, knitting, wordsmithing, and Haute Cuisine sections of the forum, as well as the general chat areas.

But nonetheless, we’re all one big online family, unlike SOME forums that are big and impersonal. I have two “adopted” sisters, an online mom..Not to mention the crazy perverted couple that lives next door and the crazy child hating person that lives across the street.

But all of this is brought together by the lovely women (and men) who make up the Anti-Craft editorial & creative staff, and the knitters, crocheters, and cook-ers (yes.) who submit to the magazine, giving it the content that we crave.

You have to understand, this is something I love and Care about. The Anti-craft (and the AC community) is my dearest friend(s) right now.

One other thing you have to know, is that I really enjoy knitting, cooking, and sewing. Even though I’m a..Subversive? Anti-Mainstream? Certainly not definitively “Punk” or “Goth”. But I don’t like pink fru-fru shit. I like bats and skulls and crossbones..I have ties to the punk and goth community. But I still enjoy these crafty skills. Just becuase I want to wear black pants with chains all over them does not mean I have to pay 50 dollars for them.

So when someone like Steven Wells attacks something that I know and love and enjoy, and basically calls me (and loads of other people I know) something I’m not, that’s when I get ANGRY.

I’m talking about two articles that Steven Wells has written.
1) The Rise and Fall of Adolf Knitler

2) Punk Knitting: Has Youth Culture Gone Mad?

Read those, then come back to me.

Read them?

Don’t you feel like you need a shower?

Seriously, It’s people like this that make me afraid to step out my front door without a handgun, a heavy stick, or more apropriatly, two very sharp and pointy sticks. And string. Lots of string.

From my point of view, Steven Wells is either jealous of out talents. Have you seen some of the stuff that people can crank out? I’ll admit, I cringe when i see a fun fur scarf made on a knitty noddy (ew.), or one more damned thing made with homespun. I laugh with the rest of them at G-DAWFUL mistakes like the ones fouind at What not to Knit and You Knit What?!

“Then there’s Anticraft, subtitled “Knitting, beading and stitching for the slightly sinister.” One can only assume they’re using “slightly” here to mean “not at all.” And that “anti” is a misspelling of “auntie.”  “

Okay, I’m not going to go into detail here, but seriously. What about Craftster? I don’t see him hootin’ and Hollerin’ about how “Anti” it is, and it’s older than Anti-Craft! “No Tea Cosies without Irony!” is their slogan. Snarkiness abounds at Craftster, and their projects are no less “Subvervise” than what you find at the AC.

Also, I take personal offense to being called a Knit Nazi. Knit Nazis, IMHO, are the stuck up bitches who say “YOU HAVE TO USE THE RECCOMNDED YARN. AND IT HAS TO BE SILK/WOOL/BAMBOO. OMG.” They Heil the makers of Cascade, Noro, and Rowan yarns. NOT that I don’t like them, they are nice yarns, but way to expensive for someone cheap like me.

Here’s what it boils down to, Mr. Wells:

Punk is, at it’s heart, a DIY culture. Seat falling out of your pants? Hold it in place with a net of safety pins. Cold hands, need to use your fingers? Chop up an old pair of gloves. Want a skirt but all you have is an old pair of pants? Cut the seat and crotch, add some pretty/awesome fabric, and make a skirt. Don’t have the 25 dollars for that “Ramones” hat? Knit one! Yarn & sticks are by far cheaper, and you can make it look how the hell ever you want.

Seriously, I think he’s the type of person who hangs out Hot Topic becuase it’s “Punk.”

The Ramones shake their middle finger at you, Mr Wells. And I’m sure Joey’s Mom knitted him plenty of sweaters with the Anarchy symbol on them.

So I promised ya’ll pictures of Finished Objects, here’s some of the things I’m entering in the county fair.

1) Swamp Witch (Pattern from The Anti-Craft). I did this out of 1 strand of Red Heart worsted (Carrot), 2 strands craon simplysoft (Mango and Rubine Red), and one strand of Yarn Bee Soft Delight (Red).
Without the fringe, this swamp witch is 61″ long, with fringe it’s 72″ long. It was knitted on size 35 needles. Shut up.

2) Sparky. Sparky is a hand puppet, pattern available from Berroco (In the free patterns section –> Kids. He was knitted using one strand of caron simplysoft (black) and one strand of Red Heart Symphony (red/brown), on size 8 needles. The mouth lining was Bernat Softee Chunky, and the ear linings was one strand of caron simply soft in black. This took me about 6 hours to knit up. It’s SUPER easy. I used satin covered buttons for the eyes.

Cute, right?

3) Baby Bonnet. The pattern is “Kiah’s Cute Lace Bonnet” from Kody May Knits (Link on the sidebar). This knitted up in about three hours, and used less than 1/4 skein of Caron Simply Soft Ombre (in Baby Ombre) on size 8(?) needles. I love Kody May’s patterns, and plan on making several more, before my time knitting is up (whenever the hell THAT is.). Go visit Kody May’s site if your interested in kickass charts, knitting hats, or knitting hats with kickass charts on them. Seriously. GO.

Now, for non knitting things, I’ve made:

An Elvis Apron - This was a pattern I hijacked from an apron that my mom receieved in the mail (that I promptly stole becuase I wear aprons and she doesn’t), called the “50’s diner apron”. What goes better with 50s and diners than Elvis?

And, another from the Anti-Craft, A Petticoat for the Ages. This was made from Pink Superstretch denim ($1.00/yard), and ivory cluny lace. I made a shorter version becuase I had EXACTLY 8 feet of lace, and I was unwilling to pay another 3 dollars for another 4 feet. So short version it is. I think it’s adorable. Sometimes you just need pink, and lace. OK?!

As for other stuff, I’m opening up a “Fortune Telling” tent at the county fair, where I’ll be reading Tarot Cards.

As someone said on the Anti-Craft forums: SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK!

Also, I’ll be participating in Ravelympics 2008, kind of like the Knitting Olympics, but not quite, becuase Ravelry is hosting it, not the Yarn Harlot. It should be pretty fun. I’m knitting for Team Anti-Craft! WOO! I’m not sure what I’m making just yet, but I have an idea, and it involves colorwork..lots of colorwork.
Oy.

Anyway, that should do you for now.

Also, I’m thinking of opening up a Tarot Blog. What do ya’ll think? I’m getting really good with Tarot cards, and I could possibly take other people’s readings, similar to what’s done on Youtube on a daily basis.

Any thoughts?

I know I’ve been MIA for the past few weeks.

The <3 hat came out crappy. So crappy I’m not posting pictures.

So, I’ve been working on stuff for the county fair. If I enter 20 items I get a free ticket to the fair. SWEET!

So here’s THE LIST:

(Bold items have been completed)

Apron

Skirt

Knitted Hat

Knitted Doll Clothing

Silk Floral Arrangement

Knitted Baby Blanket

Knitted Kids Sweater

Knitted Shawl/Stole

Christmas Stocking

Paper Flapping Bat Toy

Kirigami Christmas Decorations

Origami..something

Zentangle Drawing

White Bread

Pumpkin Bread

Chocolate Orange Truffles

Spice Cookies

Peach or Blackberry cake

Chess Pie

Mock Pecan Pie

That’s 20 items.

YAY!

Anyway, so I think that’s it, actually. For now.

I’m prolific, arent i?

Mood: Creative

Music: Panic! at the Disco - There’s A Reason These Tables Are Numbered..

So, I Less Than Three stuff.

For those of you who don’t understand I present to you the following.

<3

Is a heart, yes? Well, when you break it down, it is the “Less Than” symbol and number 3.

So when you say “I <3 Nerds.”

You could phrase it “I Less - Than- Three Nerds.”

And you would show your true nerdiness.

So the hat I’m knitting (The 3rd Eye Chullo from the book “Knit Wit” by Amy Singer) is supposed ot have an embroidered eye on it.

But I don’t want an eye. I want to put “Less- Than- Three.” on it. Becuase I AM A NERD.

K?

I’ll post pictures when I’m done with it (which should be sometime in the next few hours.).